“I once had a couple of bad years [bad.gers]. They just kind of showed up on my doorstep. I hear it's not unheard of but not everybody gets them.”
 
 
Character List and descriptions
 
Milton-Lead. 30's. Depressed. Single, working from home as a tech writer. In touch with current affairs but feels lost in the world.
 
Agnus-Milton's black and white, badger-esque housecat. Slender and sleek. Many of the male badgers take a liking to Aggy.
 
Badger- American, cigar-smoking, leader of the pack. Bit of a Marlon Brando vibe. No bullshit with this guy. His fur is greying and he has very blue eyes.
 
Maud-Badger's sow. Wears a red ribbon that ties her fringe in a top knot. Tries to be polite but this often backfires. Her nose is luminous pink.
 
Alan-Young badger. Insults and offends Milton a lot without realizing it. Wears his fringe gelled up and walks with a swagger.
 
Graham- Chubby badger. Good humored but very clumsy.
 
Tim-Milton's neighbour. Works on his family farm. Also in his 30s, also lives alone, also working remotely. Forced together by Milton's worried Aunt Marge, who sends Tim on check-up missions. Though Tim is in a very similar situation in his life he is very much reconciling his happiness using the old Irish method of “Not as bad off as your man down the road.” Milton often gives Tim spins into the city, which he tries to use as bargaining power when Tim begins to suspect foul play with the badgers.
 
Assortment of badgers -Agitate Milton in a variety of inappropriate situations leading to outbursts and odd behavior that the ignorant public attribute to poor mental health. A lot of mischief is caused by the younger badgers or 'rollers' who barrel around by crushing themselves into little balls and rolling from place to place, leaving a path of destruction in their wake, which is often blamed on Milton.
 
Aunt Marge- Milton's overly invasive Aunt, who means well. Has a layer of fuzz on all visible parts of her body and a severe dowagers hump from working hard all of her life. She has a particularly badger-esque appearance and the badgers fear this supersized version of themselves. Believes Milton has lost his mind ever since his fiance left him and that he is hallucinating as a result of loneliness and isolation when he tries to tell her about his badger troubles.